Friday, May 14, 2010

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/04/someone-should-probably-kill-this-post.html

The Coca-Cola Corporation is a responsible partner in bringing you refreshment. The next time you feel a bit pequod, (peaked? peekud? peak ed?) PEKID! -

Cut!

The Coca-Cola Corporation is a responsible partner in bringing you refreshment. Sure, other companies bring you fine, fizzy beverage options, but only the Coca-Cola Corporation brings you Coca-Cola: the Finest Surgary Corporate Beverage In The World. Whether you're cracking the cap on that classic glass bottle, twisting off the breaky-thread screw-off lid of the plastic bottle option, or popping the pull-pin on the ol' red aluminum hand grenade of flavor that is the iconic and formidable Can Of Coke Classic, you're sure to enjoy the taste sensation that for years has had millions fleeing their homes to seek it out wherever it hides: in movie theaters. In supermarkets. At your local top-brand fast-food restaurant. Or sometimes, just sitting there in a machine on a street corner.

Chilling.

CUT: At any upscale dining establishment - Lord, if you ask, and they don't have it, if they try to sell you something else? LEAVE. That's a sure sign of a shithole, restaurant-wise.

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